Who Am I

I was transferring old files from my computer this week and came across my college essays. Among them was this random draft that I never revised or used. Really interesting to see how I thought just three years ago.

The short version about me would say all the basics: that I’m seventeen, a senior in high school, a thirteen year veteran of home-school, a writer, a golfer, a person. But the facts you already know and they only tell part of the story, the way one can only estimate the time of day by the position of the sun. I can tell you that I am a compulsive daydreamer with a heart for helping others. I want to be involved, which sometimes means I have the heart-wrenching task of choosing between the thousand things I want to do. I can tell you that while I am quite mild I’m very passionate and extremely curious. When I was seven I saved all my changes to buy a small colorful notebook from the drugstore—my first diary. Now, sixteen journals later my life has begun its own path with turns and scenery uniquely its own. I am extremely excited about where it leads and the stops and people lining the way.

So, the question is, what makes me tick, how did I become who I am, and what have I learned in my seventeen years through the many adventures I’ve had (and there have been many)? Well, I’ve learned that sometimes you can surprise yourself; when climbing a rock wall, you should not look down; when you pick up a baby frog it tickles your hand in the cutest way; cucumbers should always be planted at the end of a garden; if the lights go out during your dance recital keep tapping; it’s possible to read Breaking Dawn in four days; you should go to a rally at least once in your life—it will change your life; music is a bare necessity (after food and clothing but before shelter); everyone should read the Human Rights; if you’ve been in a snowstorm you’re lucky; you can fit six people and three golf bags in a golf cart; there’s no place like the library; if you take a mouse off a trap don’t look at it; learn how to make pancakes by heart so you don’t starve; it’s okay if you don’t like vacuuming; what goes around does come around (life is much a like a boomerang and deja vu is real); super hero movies rock; if you enter enough contests you’ll win something; knowledge comes in many packages; you can do anything if you read about it first; running in a thunderstorm should not be repeated (I should take my own advice on this one); if a bird food package says it attracts wilder birds believe it; when you make a mistake try really hard not to do it again; don’t beat yourself—you are not a punching bag! Read poetry, it helps to know there’s other people with the same thoughts; have no regrets after Thanksgiving cause it only comes once a year; few people know you like you know yourself, and you don’t even know yourself; “neither you nor the world knows what you can do until you have tried” – Emerson; if you’re feeling down read Emerson; it only takes a utility knife, spatula, screwdriver, and some patience to move sod and lots of water to keep it growing; don’t wait till to open your presents Christmas; if you’re dressed up like a witch for Halloween don’t wave at young kids-you’ll scare the poor children half to death; you get points for waking up early to see a meteor shower even if you missed the meteors; a broken heart can heal; no matter how many times you call to win free tickets you’re never the fifteenth caller; keep your word; if you love someone you should tell them that every time you see them (and even when you don’t).

That’s what life has taught me so far. These are the facts that shaped who I am and how I think. I know I’ve done what I can to show you…me. There is so much to learn about a person in such a short time span, the key is to show others something worthwhile about you, a reason to make them want to know more. The rest, is up to fate.

Sometimes, when the sun is just setting and it’s rained, with hot steam coming off the street and a cool breeze flowing through the air, I like to sit on the front porch and think about how much I truly love life.


photo credit: karine*imagine via photopin cc